Lakitu - Mario World Lakitu - Mario World

Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Why Mario Isn't a Hero


Most people would argue the fact that Mario could be a villain, saving the princess and all. However, after doing research (and lots of it), I discovered Mario has taken part in animal cruelty, murders, and even sexual content.
  1. Mario takes part in animal cruelty. In his second game, mainly starring the character Donkey Kong ( that's in italics because that's the game I'm talking about) Mario actually abuses Donkey Kong, who's unfortunately Mario's pet. Anyway,  in the game, Mario actually beats DK and Donkey Kong got angry so he took Pauline (I'll talk about her in my next topic). Mario fixes this by beating DK on the head with a hammer and goes to kissing his girlfriend.

Mario with a hammer.

    Also, in the Game & Watch series, there's a game called "Donkey Kong Circus". In the game, you're Donkey Kong balancing on a barrel. You need to juggle pineapples while avoiding being burnt by the torches. Oh yeah, if you get burnt, Mario laughs at you. Super Mario Wiki claims: "This game may be set as a prequel to the original Donkey Kong, since it is said that it was Mario who unwittingly started the conflict by mistreating his pet."
    Game & Watch's "Donkey Kong Circus"
2. Mario cheats on three girls at once. Of course, Mario and Peach have something going on. But what about Daisy? Pauline? Well, you guys already know about Mario cheating on Pauline for Peach, but in Super Mario Land, at the end, you kiss Daisy... on the lips!
Who would kiss this terrifying thing!?
3. Mario Murders the toads. In the original Mario plat former, the manual suggested that King Koopa (Bowser) turned all of the Mushroom Kingdom's inhabitants into brick blocks.
Wait. the same blocks we destroy to get money and items? Seems kind of extreme just to save one of your three girlfriends.
One of the blocks (toads) you can destroy (kill)
And trust me. Mario does even worse things that what I've mentioned.
Have I convinced you?
However, also keep checking my blog for more awesome posts on Mario!

Saturday, June 21, 2014

Questions on Mario: What is Petey Piranha?

Of course, Petey Piranha is a large, walking piranha-plant but is more flower-like. But how did all this happen? Like my Queen Bee article (see last post) I'm going to try to figure this question out, starting with small comments and then gradually increasing to more technical and life-like qualities that makes the game not make much sense.

Of course, you could just think of this abomination as a giant mutant plant and go on with your day and think about how non-important this is, right? Well, if you play Mario games, this is actually very important.
Petey has a weird backstory which I honestly wouldn't think of, as much as I love Mario games. You see, I don't think if you go down into a sewer, you'll find turtles and dragons and mushrooms that make you big. Of course, this is just a game, but my job is to ruin it for you.
So, my theory is we've polluted the Mushroom Kingdom with our waste and have made Petey the gigantic mess he is today. No wonder he spits brown goo on other plants!

Look what we've done to these poor plants!
So, Mario is really just fighting a giant piece of feces. Well, at least in my theory. Let's look deeper into this.
According to the actual Super Mario Sunshine game (where Petey was introduced) when you defeat Petey, he explodes into the brown goo. However, he still comes back repeatedly in other games. How? According to my theory, there's multiple Peteys that are all made out of the dumps that our humans take.
Also, you don't see human waste laying around the Mushroom Kingdom. So where does it all go? It can't just disappear!
However, this is just a theory. Feel free to do more research on this and tell me in the comments! I could do an update post on this topic! Also, don't forget to read the Queen Bee post for more Questions on Mario!

Also keep checking my blog for more awesome information on Mario!
  • Theory by Tobias Hysell

Questions on Mario: How Big is Queen Bee (Honey Queen)?

Being introduced in Super Mario Galaxy (2007), Queen Bee was shown as a giant bee who had "the most furious itches". In order to win the level, you needed to fix these itches by collecting the stars off her body while she was screaming weird comments.
The Small bee is actually Mario collecting Stars.
She was re-introduced in Mario Kart 7 as a playable character for the first time, and she was oddly only a little bigger than Mario...
These images aren't edited at all. For proof,
check the sites in the references.
So how could Honey Queen Be about two-hundred times the size of Mario at first, then shrink to about one-and-a-fourth the size of him?
According to her Physical Appearance on Super Mario Wiki, she's about ten times the size of a normal bee. Here's my comparison:

I think I was lied to...
Well, that was a wiki, so we can't really trust them. We should find a source we can trust more.
"Honey Queen is the new name being given to the Queen Bee character who first made her debut in 2007's Super Mario Galaxy for the Wii. Her body's been shrunken down considerably to be able to fit inside a kart, as in her prior appearances she was so enormous that Mario could crawl around on her body to nab some goodies – perhaps this is why she's a heavyweight racer? You unlock her by getting first in the Banana Cup 150cc."
I got this information from, which is only editable to the actual publishers. It already talks about how her model was shrunken to fit in a car, but how is she still a heavyweight? if she was already shrunken, her original body weight would already be the weight of a large racer, so how does her weight not shrink as well?
Well, I guess I'll never know how big Queen Bee really is. Try to do your own information to figure out and post it in the comments! I might make a future post updating this! I'm also going to keep looking to find out her real size/weight.
In the meantime, keep checking my blog for more awesome posts about Mario!
  • Size comparison by Tobias Hysell

The Legend of Mario: Mario Refrences in The Legend of Zelda Series

We all know (or at least should know) that Nintendo references it's own games repeatedly. Included upon these references is Nintendo's most famous video game character Mario, and it's second most famous game The Legend of Zelda. These two game franchises have interacted multiple times. Some people even believe they're on the same planet. I'm actually going to prove this theory, even though I don't have any opinions on it at all.

  • In "A Link to the Past", you can find a painting of Mario and if you pull it, Rupees will come out
  • Chain Chomps, a famous Mario enemy, appear in many Legend of Zelda games. In Link's Awakening, the famous enemy was called "Bow-Wow", and actually helped Link throughout a certain dungeon
The Chain-Chomp's (Bow-Wow's) appearance in Link's Awakening.

  • The character "Wart" (Super Mario Bros. 2 in America, Doki Doki Panic! in Japan) appears in Link's Awakening and helps Link by teaching him "The Frog's Song of Souls"
  • Also in Link's Awakening, several Mario character sprites appear in the game's code
  • An image of Peach is seen, but it's says "Christine"
  • Once again, in Link's Awakening, one cave in the second dungeon which resembles World-1 in Mario features Piranha- Plants and Goombas. Unlike most enemies, you can stomp on the Goombas

Since there's so many references in Link's Awakening, I can't list them all. However, check

the references for more.


The picture of Peach.

  • In Ocarina of Time, Ingo, Malon and Talon wear Bowser necklaces
  • You can also see images of Peach, Luigi, Mario, Yoshi and Bowser on the window to the right in the castle courtyard
  • In Majora's Mask, The Happy Mask Salesman has a Mario mask on the back of his backpack.

An image of Malon's Bowser necklace. Malon also looks like Mario and sleeps how Mario does in Super Mario 64. 
There's many more references, but I need to do more posts. Keep checking my blog for more awesome information on Mario!

The Luigi 'Shroom

The Luigi 'Shroom will be an item added to a new game for Wii U called "Mario Maker". In this game, you'll be able to make your own Super Mario levels, whether they're pixelated or computer animation. You'll also be able to add tons of new or old items, power-ups and enemies, but one unique item is the Luigi 'Shroom, a tall, skinny mushroom that resembles the Dried 'Shroom (Paper Mario series) and makes Mario tall and skinny. So why was such a unique and useless item added to this game?
Mario using the Luigi 'Shroom
Well, this item actually has a strange backstory that I've never heard any game do before. You see, this amazing yet useless item is based on a glitch that's not that famous. In the original Mario plat former, Super Mario Bros., there was a bug during development that made Mario really Skinny, like Luigi. I'm pretty sure Nintendo put this in kind of as a joke, but I don't have any proof that they did. All I know is this item is based on that glitch and I don't see how it can be useful whatsoever. If I somehow get a Wii U and this game, I'll try to post some more information on the Luigi 'Shroom (mainly how it's useful).
Keep checking my blog for more awesome information on Mario games!